A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum Soundtrack
Lyrics
Comedy Tonight
(Sondheim)
(Prologus)
"Playgoers, I bid you welcome. The theatre is a temple, and we are here to
worship the gods of comedy and tragedy. Tonight, I am pleased to announce a
comedy. We shall employ every device we know in our desire to divert you."
Something familiar
Something peculiar
Something for everyone -
A comedy tonight
Something appealing
Something appalling
Something for everyone -
A comedy tonight
Nothing with kings
Nothing with crowns
Bring on the lovers
Liars and clowns
Old situations
New complications
Nothing portentous or polite
Tragedy tomorrow
Comedy tonight!
"Tragedy tomorrow, comedy tonight!"
Something expensive
Something offensive
Something for everyone -
A comedy tonight
Passions and potions
Constant commotions
Something for everyone -
A comedy tonight
Nothing with kings
Nothing with crowns
Bring on the lovers
Liars and clowns
Old situations
New complications
Nothing portentous or polite
Tragedy tomorrow
(Prologus/Proteans)
Comedy tonight!
(Proteans)
Something convulsive
Something repulsive
(Prologus)
Something for everyone -
A comedy tonight!
Something esthetic
(Proteans)
Something balletic
(Prologus)
Something for everyone -
(Proteans)
A comedy tonight
(Prologus)
Nothing with gods
Nothing with fate
(Proteans)
Weighty affairs
Will just have to wait
(Prologus)
Nothing that's formal
(Proteans)
Nothing that's normal
(Prologus)
No recitations to recite
(All)
Open up the curtain -
Comedy tonight!
(Prologus)
"It all takes place on a street in Rome, around and about these three houses.
First the house of Erronius, a befuddled old man abroad now in search of his
children, stolen in infancy by pirates. Second, the house of Lycus, a buyer and
seller of the flesh of beautiful women. That's for those of you who have
absolutely no interest in pirates. And finally, the house of Senex, who lives
here with his wife and son. Also in this house lives Pseudolus, slave to the
son. Pseudolus is probably my favorite character in the piece. A role of
enormous variety and nuance, and played by an actor of such... well, let me put
it this way... I play the part."
Anything you ask for -
Comedy tonight!
"And now, the entire company!"
(All)
Something familiar
Something peculiar
Something for everyone -
A comedy tonight
Something that's gaudy
Something that's bawdy
(Prologus)
Something for everybawdy -
(All)
Comedy tonight!
(Miles)
Nothing that's grim
(Domina)
Nothing that's Greek
(Prologus)
She plays Medea later this week
(All)
Stunning surprises
Cunning disguises
Hundreds of actors out of sight
(Hero)
Pantaloons and tunics
(Senex)
Courtesans and eunuchs
(Philia)
Funerals and chases
(Domina)
Baritones and basses
(Hysterium)
Panderers
(Miles)
Philanderers
(Protean)
Cupidity
(Philia)
Timidity
(Geminae/Hysterium)
Mistakes
(Protean/Senex)
Fakes
(Vibrata/Panacea/Philia/Miles)
Rhymes
(Protean/Tintinabula/Domina)
Mimes
(All)
Tumblers
Grumblers
Fumblers
Bumblers
No royal curse
No Trojan horse
And a happy ending of course
Goodness and badness
Man in his madness
This time it all turns out all right
Tragedy tomorrow
(Prologus)
Comedy!
(Lycus)
Comedy?
(All)
Comedy tonight!
(Prologus)
One, two, three